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Fat
and Thin: Size Issues in the Workplace
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Fat and Thin: Size Issues in the WorkplaceFat: I am fat. Thin: and I am thin. Fat: I am fat. Very fat. But I am not defined by this fat. I am me, with talents you do not see, skills you refuse to recognize, and feelings you don 't believe exist. Thin: I am thin. Very thin. But I am not defined by my thinness. I am me, with talents you do not see, skills you refuse to recognize, and feelings you don't believe exist. Fat: Being fat, I am well aware of how the media hammers the "You must be thin" message into the American people. When I come to work, I bring that knowledge. And I know that many colleagues have that same knowledge. And still they stare. Or they give me the deliberate "Now that you see me looking, I'll look away" look. It can be almost unbearable to walk down a hallway. Thin: People think that I am this way because I want to be. They make faces at me, and I am constantly hearing how jealous someone is because I am so thin. Or there are the people who keep trying to feed me, or tell me that I look sick. Fat: When I first came to work here, I made it a personal goal to not intimidate people. I tried my best to be invisible. Imagine a person, made out of flesh and blood, trying to be invisible! It's like trying to catch a sunbeam and hide it in a box. I hid halfway behind walls, didn't speak in meetings without raising my hand, didn't laugh too loudly, and didn't insist on anything. Whenever a discussion started with someone, I tried to sit down whenever possible so that I wouldn't be towering over them. But it didn't work. In one of my earliest feedback, I was told that I "intimidated" people. I was told that they were physically intimidated by my size. I'm still hiding myself, trying to fit in. Thin: People are afraid I'm going to break. They treat me like a fragile flower, and presume I can't do physical things like lifting or moving things. They don't know that I can lift 70 pounds over my head. And they don 't believe me when I tell them. It makes me feel like they are telling me I am incapable of doing my job. Fat: The chairs in the conference rooms hurt my legs so painfully that I can hardly think of anything but the pain for the first few minutes of every meeting. All day meetings were agony. After a living with the pain for a very long time, I called Facilities to explain the problem and ask if a few chairs without arms could be put into the meeting rooms. I was told No. He said those meeting rooms are designed for a maximum of two and a half hours, and that I should bring my desk chair to meetings if I didn't like it. It wasn't until a couple of years later that one functional manager heard my story. Thanks to her, I can now sit as comfortably as anyone else in a meeting. I still hate all day meetings, but now I don't hate them more than anyone else does. Thin: People make jokes about the size zero. They laugh
as they say, "Who wears a size zero?! Only nobodies and nothings! Ha
ha!" Fat: Thin: Fat: When first came to work here, I looked at the R&D
and Marketing management structure around me. Everyone looked the same
to me. The same clothes, the same age, the same behaviors. I really
had problems figuring out who was who, because they looked so similar.
They were the In group. And the next promotions all seemed to go to
people who looked just like them. That sent a clear message - khakis
and polos, slender and light colored - if you weren't that, forget it.
Then lately, I looked again. Hmm, there seemed to be a few people of
size in management positions. Not bad, I thought. But then I realized
- all of those hires were hired from outside this division. Thin: People don't take you seriously here unless you're one of the In group. And size is definitely one of the factors to determine how "in" you are. Fat and Thin together (or just one of you): Don't judge us because of our size. We have talents that will amaze you, skills you can benefit from, and feelings just like you.
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